1. |
Ex-Lover
05:02
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EX-LOVER
It was an ominous occasion but not a spectacle to see
Just a shifting of framework in a paradigmatic dream
A tepid symmetry, the right and left coyly mirroring
Opposing yet complimentary, the nexus of harmony
There was a term for the weather reflecting the mood
And that term, it did escape me, but the thunder never could
So should you see that rain a coming, ask it, What does it mean?
And, Where has the sun gone on me?
Every day moves faster than the last and divides us like a great earthquake
All souls to break and be remade on your holy tectonic plates
As my hands flow prematurely and I say, Pen, meet the Page
And Pen says, How have you been old friend, and makes for an embrace
But the Page, having been hurt before, and feeling somewhat betrayed
Mourns, Pen, you can't just come back here after all these listless days
Where have you been, ex lover, off on a lark
While my tears fell down in pairs like beasts on the great ark
So Pen extends an olive branch and a sacrificial dove:
O If I could draw you one rainbow for each rainstorm, my love
I would carry you closer to show you in the mist above
That my colours could run beautiful across you in the wake of one more
Downpour so torrential it could divide our great coasts
Page interjects, If you look real close, your rainbow is nothing but a ghost
A metaphor, I might point out, for your residence and post
But Pen suggests, Empty head words are best often alone
I needed time and space and in those two are everything
It was nothing personal, you see, my omission and despondency
Merely to not appear to be redundant in our intimacy
As a fire needs air, a pen requires inactivity
A solace for thought and a longing to be
And a chance to miss you, my sweet Page, and with it a chance to reconvene
And do what we do best, our compliments are opposites
Let me show you what I mean
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2. |
Paper & Ink
03:32
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PAPER & INK
I went back into my mind like I had done so many times before
until my eyes were wide like ocean tides of truth
And you were spotted in a crowd and it was crowded and it was noisy and loud
and I was anxious and I didn't know what to do
But it was always on the back burner, back of my mind, the bottom of a pile high,
I never found the time, but with more time I could have really seen it through
That's always how it went, the time was spent too soon, I was frozen, watching my body move,
not knowing who was controlling it, or if there was anything I could do
But these are empty head words, they don't mean a thing
A Rorschach Test, just paper and ink
I went back into my mind and I'm not sure if you're the kind
to be inclined to do the same if just to see
Who could be spotted in a crowd when it is crowded and it is noisy and loud
And panic sets in and sets the scene
Cause it was always on the back burner, back of my mind, the bottom of a pile high,
I never found the time, but with more time I could have really seen it through
That's always how it went, the time was spent too soon, I was frozen, watching my body move,
not knowing who was controlling it, or if there was anything I could do
But these are empty head words from a very empty mind
Stripped away the lies and there was nothing left behind
But these are empty head sounds I have just let go
If you interpret them, don't let me know
For these are empty pursuits cause the fullness was too full
And I don't believe in your world
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3. |
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PAPER BAGS (FOR BREATHING IN)
Stores that never close and always let you in
Lights that never go off until they're dead
Smiles you might believe and deals that never end
Fuzzy feeling this is all there is
Films to ease your boredom
Music for your empty head
Paper bags for breathing in
What did you expect?
Anaesthetics and pills so you can't feel
Diagnoses and things to know as real
Definitions and words to make things clear
Moral standings and all you love and fear
Buzz words and easy answers
And every dog to have his day
Sound bytes and small decisions
What's with the long face?
You can escape
Closed circuit televisions
And a longing to relate
You will be someone different
Wearing the same face
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4. |
Incommunicado
06:20
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INCOMMUNICADO
Wonder where to go but I don't know no no no no
Wherever feels uncomfortable as I fear those lows and anyone who asks for me to slow
I don't want to slow down for you
Can't you see we're running out of time
And you could catch up to me if you like
Anywhere I go I am solo incommunicado
Any love I show is met with specious ego and everything your ugliness controls
But I don't want to judge you by your cover
O to pry beneath your surface level verse
I've been known to read the final chapter first
I want you to know
I have weighed my soul in the depths of your woe
And I want you to go
I have seen the likes of your kind and I know...
What is this joy for if we can't show it if they can't know
What are these lungs for if we can't bellow and conjure dead from twenty thousand leagues below
I don't want to hide my love from you love
Everybody really seems to get upset
But it's their issue if they haven't got here yet
I want you to know
I have weighed my soul in the depths of their woe
And I want them to go
I have seen the likes of their kind and I know...
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5. |
Archaic Smile
02:57
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ARCHAIC SMILE
We did the best we could with everything we had
And what we had wasn't much but what we did, it wasn't bad
Now I can't stay forever but I'll be here a while
With the elements corroding my sculpted archaic smile
Now everyone's a witness to what you made us see
And everybody's an accomplice to the tragedy
And everyone stands trial, subpoenaed of course
They just had to hear your version of the story in higher court
Now I am not a shepherd, but I am not a sheep
But tell me, what's the greater torment, is it to follow or to lead?
The world's gotten smaller since we've been living in this box
But there's no final judgment, no, the judgment never stops
In space it doesn't matter if you're a black hole or a star
And I reread my invitation, it still said, ' come as you are'
But still, I put on my best space suit and Saturn wore her rings
And we rode in on the comet as I dreamed, dreamed of finer things
We did the best we could with everything we had
And what we had wasn't much but what we did, it wasn't bad
Now I can't stay forever but I'll be here a while
With the elements corroding my sculpted archaic smile
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6. |
Tornado Eyes
05:41
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TORNADO EYES
I needed room for you so I emptied my head
And I did tie my tongue, but there was nothing to be said
Fear not, my muted lover, you've hit no wall
Fear not, my muted lover, your living says it all
Then you remarked there is no dark, only the absence of light
Only the soul is real and so you must fight
Fear not, my vengeful lover, not for your life
Fear not, my vengeful lover, rather, in spite
So kill the head and the body will die
Your goals, vain and futile, serve to imply
All of your constant spinning, yes, it does align
With the stillness of your centre, and those tornado eyes
We are but aimless children and none can see
Our sight: imagination. We make-believe.
Fear not, my fertile lover, you must exist
Fear not, my fertile lover, you gave birth to this
And so I'm told there is no cold, only the absence of heat
But when the fire dies we still must freeze
Fear not, my frozen lover, you did combust
Fear not, my frozen lover, you living dust
So kill the head and the body will die
Your goals, vain and futile, serve to imply
All of your constant spinning, yes, it does comply
With the stillness of your centre, and those tornado eyes
All these totemic objects be too unreal
Must have imagined them with unconscious zeal
Fear not, my secret lover, quite inter-spliced
Fear not, my secret lover, black between the white
All of the world's salvation, it rests on you
It's what you do with your life, not what life has done with you
Fear not, my worried lover, meaninglessness
It is with all this nothing you do everything with
So kill the head and the body will die
Your goals, vain and futile, serve to imply
All of your constant spinning, yes, it does rely
On the stillness of your centre
It relies on the stillness of your centre and those tornado eyes
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7. |
Hush Hush
03:13
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HUSH HUSH
I was old but now I'm young these things can't be undone
So some had better run who can't afford the hefty sum
Of growing backwards from the hit and run somnambulated skeleton
To growing up into a state of stagnation
For I can see that standing still lags you behind
And I find that feeling to be the feeling of dying
Like feeling paralyzed
And now I know that I was nothing short of kind
My vision once was compromised so you could say that I was blind
But now I find that where the grey mattered sublimely in my mind
The time gone by has perpetrated that dubious disguise
For I can hear that speaking mute is your consent
And I feel that finding to be the cause of such lament
Your state of indifference
I could touch you if you understood my touch
And wouldn't blush or go hush hush for it was all of it too much
And plus what you don't comprehend, perplexes, is ridiculous
So sorry our proximity was the cause of such nonplus
Can you feel it in your walk the way you talk
As I see that kinaesthetic spark came as a shock
Sorry to have been mistook
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8. |
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NOT A PROUD SUN BUT A JEALOUS MOON
One night the moon stopped shining
The earth lay grey beyond its years
Half of its beasts heard sighing
And all the clouds were crying and all the oceans filling up with tears
'What of this gross inaction?',
the sun inquired of the moon,
whose face bore no reaction,
and with resigned detachment just floated there with nothing left to prove
The moon rejecting kindness
Free light to keep and pass along
But filled with self-importance says
'I'd rather offer darkness than pass along the brightness of the sun.'
'Mistake not my intention,
oh moon, I mean not to offend.'
'It's not that your light's blinding (and this is the moon talking now)
But rather emphasizing my lack of luminescence in the end.'
'I just want to shine
Not to outshine you
But I refuse to hide
All my light and life to comfort you.'
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9. |
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THE SUN IS GOING DOWN (LOVE IN ALL CONFINES)
Darkness takes the wake and Lightness takes the sleep but am I back again?
Or conversely did I fall from where I ought to be and now a dream is what I seek?
We, pilgrims to the night; we, moths to the light; and we, wakers the dark will not allow
Well I was kind of hoping that something bigger and better would come around, but all I'm left with now, all I'm left with now…
Is a little less time than yesterday, a little less energy and strength
But a little more patience for the day, as I dumb down to remain
In the world of rigid lines and copy-and-paste designs
And your hilariously fashionable approach to love in all confines
I was tired of talking to myself so I just walked out: I figured this picture's got to be worth a thousand words, so what the hell?
Maybe I was barking up the wrong tree and I need to be kept on a shorter leash cause when I'm free is when I'm lost and when I'm lost is when I'm free
I got tired of preaching to the choir cause our desires I think deep down are all the same, they're just differently inspired
But I was kind of hoping that something bigger and better would come around, but it's getting kind of cold, and the sun is going down…
The sun is going down on you, sister; the sun is going down on me
The sun is going down on you brother; what other similarity do we need?
Could you not just hold me for a minute, or are you too weak to admit defeat?
Would you not surrender for a moment in the miracle chance that we meet?
No, I've got to erase these empty-head words from off my face so The Word Of God can shine on down and I'll be wholly replaced
What I could use is a clean slate or a fresh break but how long can I wait to be baptized, cleansed, forgiven and given a new name?
I don't know if I've been put here just to see what's going on, like some sophisticated camera, and for an audience long gone
But you know I was kind of hoping that something bigger and better would come around, but I'm managing my expectations better now
And I'm not holding my breath, I'm not counting to ten
And I'm not saying next time will be different
In the world of rigid lines and copy-and-paste designs
And your deplorably predictable approach to love in all confines
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10. |
When Your Eyes Close
03:38
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WHEN YOUR EYES CLOSE
When you wake up it will be a new day
And all those memories, they will be a dream that you made
Maybe from boredom, maybe for escape
Maybe they told you it was just that way,
Sometimes that's all it takes
Placing value on its face
But re-erase
When your eyes close, the world stops existing
When your mind goes, its people will be listening
For the ending of the world as we know it
For the spaceships to come back and restore it
When you hear me I know that I am speaking
When you feel me I know that I am feeling too
And when your eyes close, the world stops existing.
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M.D. Edwards Guelph, Ontario
Find my new project CONDUCTOR at conductorelectronic.bandcamp.com !
M.D. Edwards was
the acoustic singer-songwriter project (2012-2014) of Guelph Canada's Matthew Davey (see also: CONDUCTOR, Nervous Wrecked, Lazu Lie).
The debut 7-track album 'Walk Through Paint' was released on 12" vinyl and download in May 2012.
The 10-track 'Empty Head Words' followed in January 2014.
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